Friday, March 20, 2015

Bittersweet

Ahh what a wonderful feeling to take a shower after a long day of feeding and fetching, phone calling and frazzling thought processes.

Just as I had begun to unwind, the phone rang.
I bet it's my Mom returning my call, I'll call her back in a bit.

Then it rang again. Before I could get the shampoo rinsed out I heard my husbands phone ring in the other room.

There was trouble in the calving barn.

Looks like no time for conditioner tonight.

In 15 minutes I was standing in the calving barn with a wet head and my dirty clothes waiting on the vet to arrive.

Earlier that evening a cow had had a cute little white calf, but oddly didn't have much interest in taking care of it. This occasionally happens with a first time mama, but this girl was seasoned and had always done good before. Happen to think of it she took great care of her twins last year.

It wasn't long before another little set of feet began to show and we forgave big mama for being distracted from calf number 1.

There was a little problem though. The tiny feet that had emerged were upside down and upon further examination it was found that the second calf had become lodged in the cows pelvis.

We waited for the vet, who administered an epidural and was able to deliver the calf.

Sadly baby heifer number 2 had died before we were able to deliver her.

While we worked to ensure mama had everything she needed to be on her way to recovery, she only wanted to give attention to little baby number 1 who was now sleeping in the corner.



In the days following mama wasn't doing very well and we tried everything we could to help her get better.

Baby had settled in well at the calf barn and was healthy and happy.

Sadly 4 days after calving mama couldn't go on any longer.
She died at at the VT Vet Hospital receiving all the care she could be given.
She had developed an infection from a trauma to her uterus during the delivery.

Today baby moved into the big pen with the other calves, ready to start her adventures here at Hillside Farm.


As I watched this new little life take on the world with ease, I found myself remembering with sadness the other two lives that had not been able to do so.

But...I also found myself very thankful that it was not a total loss.

I find season changes to mean something very different since I have been a farmer.
Much more defining of where life has been, where it is going.

With the beginning of spring today, I couldn't help but think of the winter.
What a long winter it has seemed to be.
How much more glorious the coming of spring seems to be with every passing year.






Since I have been away I must say I put on a few more miles


Consumed an immeasurable amount of coffee


Saw the world from a new perspective




And overcame some fears



 Of course there was plenty of time in the big red barn







But after standing there with a wet head in the calving barn at midnight, after seeing the littlest calf face life with such resilience, I thought maybe I should look for a little something to smile about after this long winter.

And it turns out, if I looked very closely there were plenty of things to help me know that  looking for hope this spring won't let me down.

Neither will being thankful for what I learned in the cold of winter, 
or in the calving barn at midnight.






 



So tomorrow I will get up, feed my faithful dog, two cats and six baby chicks.
I will watch after a barn full of calves and a couple hundred cows with my hardworking husband.
And I will thank God for every Spring he sends.

I hope the sunshine heads towards you all very soon!

Here's a video clip of little baby playing this morning, she's the one in the blue jacket.







Monday, January 19, 2015

Glass


Splat.

Just like that Monday morning gets underway with cow manure in my hair at 8am.
I love interesting weeks.
On the bright side I have ordered new purple Muck boots, sure to distract in the event of poop in hair or no makeup kind of days.

As we have entered the third full week of the new year, I am sad to report that I came pretty close to abandoning any glimpse of a new years resolution that I might have made.

But...
Don't worry.
Let me start at the beginning.

You see, I have never celebrated New Years the way I did this past one. 
I had always felt a twinge of nostalgia at the events that had taken place and felt an air of excitement for the new year to come.

This year I just prayed it wouldn't be as hard.
Please don't get me wrong, I had more blessings poured on me in the past year than I could have ever imagined and I am beyond grateful for every one of them.

But somewhere in the other 26 I had celebrated I didn't feel so...well...umm...tired.
Even though I felt a little different than usual I vowed to press on with bigger goals than ever, with more love, more tough, more everything.

It was last week after the 5th cow had surgery for a reason we couldn't find, and after that cutest white calf got sick, my husband got a stitch in his hand, and Bandit ripped his toe nail off and the wee tiniest cute calf accidentally bloodied my nose with her enthusiasm...

That I cracked.

Like a glass that remains to stay in one piece, just barely.







So it was no irony that as I pulled the Christmas ornaments off with a little less care than usual, this happened.



The funny thing is, I always thought this one was plastic. 
Until it shattered all over the living room floor.

What I realized just as I was caving in under the pressure of being the better, tougher me was clear as glass as I crawled around the floor looking for the tiny pieces.

Life isn't made out of plastic.
Neither are we.

So I'm restarting my resolutions, this time remembering that I'm human, an so is everyone else.
Maybe then I can see the beauty in being fragile and I think that is where I'll find the kind of tough I want to be.




The week in review:

Baby sis gets her drivers license this week.
I made her take me for another drive while I can still tell her what to do :)


Bandit's toe is just fine, so is Scott's hand...and my nose.


The calves are feeling better.


Lola and I enjoyed the sunny rays for a few minutes over the weekend.


We have a very cute new calf who has lots of personality.


She likes to get out of her pen and play hide and seek.


The cows are feeling much better too, which gives me more time to love on these little cuties!


Here's to another week of adventure! 













Confetti

Busy blogger disclaimer: I wrote this post two weeks ago and forgot to publish it. Oops. Hope you can still enjoy the New Years theme.


I was in a big hurry to get ready for the new years party I was planning to attend. 
A new year, I was ready for it. 
The one we were saying goodbye to didn't even have a clear feeling I would remember.
It left my heart a lot more full, a little more worn.

I was determined to just get one more box unpacked before I jumped in the shower.
This years Christmas present will probably be put to good use for quite some time.
We moved into our new home on December 13! 
It even came with a barn!
My family didn't worry until I started talking about mini donkeys...
I'll have to break them in slowly.



Now you know what I have been up to all these weeks I forgot to write a post :)


As I hurriedly emptied the contents of the box, I was feeling so proud of myself that I had so much time left to get ready. I think I will wear that....

Crash!

That card game in my hand had slipped out of my grip and hundreds of cards now lay spread all over the floor like confetti. 

I almost smiled at how much this mess felt like a reflection of the past year of my life.
So many beautiful colors so mixed up I couldn't focus on where each one belonged.
Much like the memories of the success and failure, triumph and tribulations, however small they might have been.

As I picked them up one by one, I started to realize that just because sometimes life deals us challenges along with the gifts, doesn't mean I shouldn't be grateful for having been dealt them.

So this year I'm going to try a different tune, more about living, less about counting.

As Kenny put it...

"You've got to know when to hold 'em
Know when to fold 'em

Know when to walk away
Know when to run
You never count your money
When you're sittin' at the table
There'll be time enough for countin'
When the dealin's done"



I hope your new year is off to a great start!
Here's what's been going on at Hillside Farm over the holidays.


Cold robots


Spoiled kitties


Princess of the Barn


Silly sisters

Silly Pumpkin

The manger is admired by all

I can't get out of bed kind of day

Mountain ice

Long line at the drive thru again
Christmas spirit

Sunrise sights

Sunset lights

Christmas hugs

Good conversations

Baby Rudolph

Twins sisters Jingle and Bell

Techno dog

Cozy Sunday

Happy times